니가 좋은 이유

| Tuesday, December 18, 2007

You can't expect people to accept you if you can't accept yourself.

Hm.. I've known all of you long enough to tell you what I absolutely dread about myself. =] Fair exchange you have to do the same. So yea here goes...

Lmao idk how to start this blog but yea um it was in 2001 i think :-?. Yea it was the summertime. && I don't wanna go into detail [dont fuckin ask cuz i aint gone tell you im sensitive bout this shit =|] so yea I kinda got into an accident. && I got burned real badly mostly on the right side of my body; luckily it only got my right arm the most. But yea third degree so basically when i looked at my arm it was pure white it had completely burned off my epidermis. My mom wasnt there; she was working at the hospital so she worked late nights; I was only 13 my baby sister was 5; && Tiara's ass is useless. Sooo my mom's best friend son Brandon called an ambulance. && I just sat there && waited && passed out cuz for some reason i couldnt breathe. I woke up in a hospital room && I saw my mom walkin up to my room. I'm mad the first thing I said was "Are you mad at me?" wtf I was a dumbass kid I swear. Spent a week in the hospital wit a cast that was heavier than my fuckin leg. && the shit itched. Had to keep putting my arm in this whirlpool thingamajigger to clean it. Idk what the fuck they had in there but that shit stung like a bitch ! Omg I swear them nurses heard sum words cuz that shit hurt ! I had to do that everyday for a whole week ! wth ! I kinda had fun in the hospital. Since I spend alot of time in them anyway. My nurse asked if I wanted to play video games or do something else. && you know what I said ? I told her I wanted to paint. I painted my mother a jewelry box..it was the shape of an apple. I was such an innocent child && naeive. I miss that innocence..thinking your mother can protect you from anything..when the truth is nobody's safety is guaranteed. =/ ahh. But anyway I finally got to go home..they wrapped my wound in gauze && I was weak cuz I didnt even want to eat. Had to be rolled out in a wheelchair smfh. A nurse came to my house everyday for two weeks after that && redressed the gauze. Bitch was funky. Smelled like bologna. OOOh i forgot to tell ya'll bout fuckin physical therapy. Omdg !!! that shit was torture ! && the irony of it all is I only had to move my arm a half inch forward && backward but that shit felt like it took hours =/. Fast forward to the nurse thing again. Yea that foreign bitch needed bout thirty baths yo....ugh. Funky Bosnian =]. When it healed it was this big ass scar..I totally despised it. I still do but now its like i really dont give a shit but anyway. I hated it yo. Real talk. I'd always cover it up. It's not so much as anybody else seeing it; i aint wanna see it. It was huge ! I could barely move my arm ! =/ && it looked disguting yo. I got surgery a couple months later on it && its smaller but still...its..idk ugly. Makes me feel ugly. I hate the thing ! wanna just rip it off me && throw it somewhere far away where i'll never see it again. Idk why df I'm babbling to ya'll but yea. I expect the same thing in return...

What's your most hated feature ? Don't just be physical it can be emotional too for the dumbasses :]