안녕하세요! 난 성아 입니다! 슈퍼주니어의 이특를 좋아요! 대한민국 좋아요! 그래서 난 한국어를 공부해요. 도와주세요 ㅋㅋ ><

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I'm basically a short, weird black/indian girl who likes Asian pop (specifically Jpop and Kpop). 22 y|o, can't wait to visit Cali next summer <3. ^^♥♥

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yo00o ughhh ! questions...
| Sunday, November 25, 2007

Am I doing something wrong ?

Did I really change for the bad; or for the good ? Will things between us go back to the way they were ? Does she care ? Do I care ?! Am I a bad person ?

Am I wrong for loving Daniel like I do ? I mean I love Jazzi too; but lately she just pushes me away. And for what ? When I'm on I see everybody talking; laughing; group messaging each other....she just sits there and doesn't even bother to join in...but I'm leaving her behind ? I'm putting her second ? I dont get how; it's like she doesn't even care so what does she want me to do ? I get tired of trying to explain myself everyday. It's getting old...and fast. Ok I feel bad I told her about the Chris thing...should I not have said anything ? It's like everytime I tell her something she goes into this lil mode where she doesn't care about nobody && nothing && constantly gm'z bout how she's a bitch && yada yada knowing deep down inside she's not bitchy as she wants to be. Because if she was then she wouldnt hurt..and like wdf I try so fuckin hard..the shit just gets tiring because it's like I'm doing it for nothing if she doesn't even wanna try or act like she cares. I mean I dont ask for Daniel to be on my mind 24/7 he's just there...what can I do ? Block him out ? Think about socks ? It's mad frustrating to keep repeating yourself over and over until you just wanna scream ! I mean I like dudes more but it's not gonna make me just say oh well fuck Jazzi. You think I've never been jealous before ? Hell yea..she takin pics kissing niggaz and shit think I wasn't jealous..shiiit. But nope. Held my tongue. Know why ? Because I like it when Jazzi smiles even if it's for a little bit. I just..idk. When I look at Daniel I see the future; and that excites me about him. Daniel's something new and I wanna make sure I know what the fuck I'm doing. Funny I never broke up with a guy but 1. And that was only cause I got tired of gettin my ass beat. I put up with cheaters; liars; thieves; all to the point I just didnt wanna exist. And like I feel like Daniel won't do that..it's mad weird ; you can't predict a person. But like predicting Daniel is like predicting myself. I'm not gonna lie he's the only dude I aint wanna share with Jazzi. I wanted em all to myself. But I miss having all that with Jazzi. So since she doesn't care anymore I just think whatever I say is useless. She stubborn as hell once she gets an idea in her head you not changing her mind. I miss things how they were..but if the person doesn't care what can you do ? =/